Dating in High School

Written by | Nani's Nuggets


So there are of course tons of serious controversial topics in the world right now. However, this topic is somewhat controversial in its own right. Is it smart to date in High School? I am using the term high school because the idea of Junior Secondary students (11-13/14) dating creeps me out just a little but High Schoolers are a little bit okay, I guess?

You may have already caught on that I am still on the fence about the issue. I just feel like we don’t know a whole lot about feelings at that age, you know? I’m in my twenties and I still question what I feel. Now I’m not saying that teens don’t experience love and true love at that. They definitely do. My major concern is that they rarely know how to handle it. Add into the mix the fact that the person they are in the relationship with may not feel the same and those darn hormones! Then there is peer pressure to do stupid stuff you would hopefully know not to do if you were older. I don’t know there are just too many factors at play here. 

I personally didn’t date in High School. Although I was never really ‘toasted’, I just didn’t see the benefit. Again, this is me and my life and the decisions I took for me. The culture in my Secondary school was very bad. At such a young age, dating was already about status and physical appearances. Those that were not toasted were probably not the right size, unattractive (according to them), too holy (as if there is such a thing), or simply not popular enough. There would be situations where a guy genuinely liked a girl but because she was not popular enough, his friends would discourage and even tease him about it so much that he doesn’t follow his heart. I found all this really troubling especially as my peers played along to all those really stupid social norms. Although I had my insecurities, compromising who I was, was never an option. 

I was talking with a couple of friends that I had known from Secondary school and the question of dating someone from our secondary school would be something I’d consider. At the moment, I responded by scrunching my nose and saying ‘it’d be too much. In other words, not likely. My friends concluded that I was simply hating on people because Secondary school was horrible for me. Now that I think about it, it’s just a little bit difficult for me to believe that those same guys that body-shamed and mocked me and others would suddenly want to pursue a relationship with me now. The sad truth is, most times, people don’t really change. But that’s just me. What do you guys think about this? I’d love to hear your thoughts on this so feel free to comment below or email me at or dm me on IG @novasnuggets_

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Last modified: April 16, 2021

2 Responses to :
Dating in High School

  1. I think its okay to forgive people for being wrong as kids/teens. It is different when you find out they are adults and still act silly. The truth is, we almost and always want people who are close to home. In secondary school, I want to believe you met people who showed weren’t silly to you. That’s a positive sign and there’s a possibility that you’re searching for that feeling, albeit unintentional.

    Its a different feeling dating someone from high school, because in high school you probably held on to the belief that love was waiting for you outside. ?

    1. You are right, David. It is important to give people second chances. It’s equally important too for all of us from now on to bear in mind that our actions have consequences even though they may not be visible at the moment. This will help avoid needing a second chance because let’s be real, not everyone gets a second chance.

      Thanks for your comment!

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